Our first two advisors believe would-be lovers need to choose between love and wisdom. More than two thousand years ago, Publilius Syrus observed, "A god could hardly love and be wise." Seven centuries later, philosopher Francis Bacon shared a similar view about earthly lovers: "It is impossible," wrote that essayist in 1625, "to love and to be wise."

William Shakespeare also had something to say about love and wisdom. His tragedy Othello ends with the suicide of the title character after he learns that his uxorocide (his murder of his wife) was based on unfounded jealousy. Before stabbing himself, the Moor of Venice implores his companions:

When you shall these unlucky deeds relate,
Speak of me as I am; nothing extenuate,
. . . then must you speak
Of one that loved not wisely but too well.

Our final piece of advice—which makes no mention of love—comes from 19th-century psychologist William James. He noted, "The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook."